Hondo Caravan: No One Saw That Coming?

We’re wrapping up Season Two today with more Hondo and some super bad life decisions on the part of, well, most of the characters in the show.

Bounty Hunters
I’m already amused by the parallels between this episode and the MedStar duology and by parallels, I just mean that they are both stories that have to do medical stations in trouble near/on a planet with an incredibly valuable crop.  Okay, it’s a stretch clearly.

Hondo is back!  Although I don’t exactly know where he’s coming from calling bounty hunters scum since he’s, you know, a pirate…

“Let’s get down to business/to defeat the pirates!”  Honestly, I’m just waiting for Anakin to break out in song as he trains these farmers into soldiers.  It’s been a few years.  Please tell me that someone in the fandom has made this music video already.

Wait and now the metal suit pirate is actually just a small little ranat sized alien?  That is straight out of Men in Black.  I swear, is this entire episode just riffing off as many other films as they possibly can?

The Zillo Beast
I’m very unclear as to why they needed to come up with some special new bomb.  Wouldn’t an EMP work just fine?  Related, I feel like any bomb that knocks out all droids isn’t going to be able tell the difference between droids, a comunit, and a mechanical hand.  Sure they had a few moments where Anakin’s hand got all sparkly and wonky but it could’ve been really neat to have an episode where one of his arms just just completely out of commission.  It would’ve made his fight against this zillo beast way cooler looking.

Speaking of my favorite Skydork, Anakin seems to have an inability to hold on to things like lightsabers and ships.  It’s honestly just becoming an unfortunate habit at this point.

Okay, Palpatine, can I just point out that even though you’re evil and all?  YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT KNOCKING A GIANT BEAST UNCONSCIOUS AND TRANSPORTING IT TO CORUSCANT IS A REALLY BAD IDEA.  Honestly, I don’t even have to know the next episode’s title to figure that out.  Argh.

The Zillo Beast Strikes Back
…and kills everyone on a planet that’s one big city.  That’s how this story goes, right?

At least Mace Windu gets that this is a bad idea even if he was the one with attack of a conscience last episode.

Most of this episode as be described as a giant ‘WELL DUH’.  Oh look, now we’re saying that we should kill the beast.  And hey!  Let’s have a debate over how immoral that is.  But wait, we’re going to kill it anyways.  AND NOW IT’S LOOSE.

Also, even though they look visually different, I’m having a very difficult time not typing ‘kaiju’ every time I mean to type beast.

I’d also like to know why anyone even bothers being surprised when Anakin improvises.  Seriously.

I will, however, give this episode props for actually having Yoda fighting with his lightsaber.  We don’t get to see that nearly enough.  I’m also sincerely enjoying the introduction of Artoo’s Taxi Service in these two episodes and hope we get to see it more often.
Hate to say it, but these two episodes are just annoying.  This all could have been avoided if they’d had a sassy gay friend they’d just dealt with the stupid thing sensibly.  WAY TO GO GUYS.

Death Trap
Wait wait wait.  Tiny little clones.  Being sent out to battle and getting field training?  Wow, I don’t even have words for how not okay with this I am.  Related, these mini clones’ coloring looks off.  That is to say, their skin is too pale and their hair should be black instead of dark brown.  It also seems to be a bit early for the clones to already be individualizing themselves so much with their hairstyles and such.  I’m also going to go ahead and call it now: the one with long hair is Boba Fett.

Okay but seriously: HOW DO NEITHER OF THE JEDI NOR ANYONE ON THE SHIP HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THESE KIDS BEING TAKEN OUT INTO THE FIELD?

Sorry.  I’m done for now.

Oh look, I was right.  Long hair is Boba.  I’m mostly neutral towards Boba Fett but this episode is making me roll my eyes at him.  I understand his desire to get revenge but oh man is listening to Aurra Sing such a terrible terrible idea.  She’s not exactly the first person in the galaxy I’d turn to for as surrogate mother figure or even the hundredth.  Ayyy.

That’s all I really have to say about this episode.  EXCEPT THAT KIDS IN THE BATTLEFIELD IS NO BUENO.

R2 Come Home
It is a truth universally acknowledged that when two Jedi have astromech droids, they will spend a good portion of that time trying to one up each other via their droids.  Or at least until one of the droids gets destroyed.  But honestly, was it ever a contest to being with?  Artoo >>> Everyone Else

That said, I’m glad that we go another episode of Artoo being the hero and saving the day.  Nothing else happened in this episode though.

Lethal Trackdown
It’s about time Ahsoka showed up again.  She had a cameo in the previous episode but she’s been gone for way too long.  This is kind of a bummer actually.  We keep going for long stretches without her only for her to pop up for a few episodes.  At least she got to kick a lot of butt this episode.

I sincerely wish that I’d had my webcam open when Aurra and Hondo greeted each other with a kiss because the expression my face just made was… special.  That said, I do like how they used Hondo in this episode.  I like that he doesn’t get involved in the fight between Aurra and the Jedi because he doesn’t want to.  It adds a bit more to his character than just debonair pirate.

Again, we get to see Ahsoka working together with another Jedi Master to solve a problem and again, a Jedi Master comments on how alike she is becoming to Anakin with her rashness and inability to be subtle.

I’m starting to detect a pattern here.  Each season ends with a bounty hunter plot.  Clearly I severely underestimated the bounty hunter involvement in this show.  No offense but I hope it won’t continue.  This show needs more Ventress.  And more Dooku.

That said, that’s it for Season Two!  Tune in again next week when I dive right into Season Three.  As always, you can keep observe my occasionally ridiculous real time commentary on Twitter @chaosbria and via the hashtag #HondoCaravan.  Until next time!

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  1. Pingback: The Hondo Caravan: Bria's Watching The Clone Wars | Tosche StationTosche Station

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